Hey Mike, I know you have this on RSS feed so you’ll see it whenever you get on the computer next. I was just wondering, how does one add a site with no visible RSS feed button (like this one) as an RSS feed? Thx maike hoep ur haevin fun wif ur girl.
Today I broke one of the USB ports on my laptop. How did I do that, you might ask? Well, coming out of my laptop are a The Matrix-like bundle of cables that I use to make it useful: external hard drive, USB mouse, headphones, TV cable, firewire, network cable, etc. I was eating sweet and sour egg rolls on my bed whilst browsing the internet, and finished the box, then attempted to toss it in the garbage. My mad basketball skills failed me, and so I leapt up to go pick up the box from my roommate’s pile of dirty clothes. What I didn’t realize, however, is that the network cable was wrapped around my leg. The laptop crashed to the floor, bending all the USB cables attached to it into very interesting shapes and snapping out a little black bit from one of the ports, rendering it unusable.
Thankfully, I was able to crawl across the floor from my broken machine and broken machine bits to throw away the empty egg roll box. Tidiness is next to godliness!
There are stories about my life that are much more interesting to tell, but I’m going to start with this one.
I woke up this morning and had a good hour to spare before I went to class. What did I spend my hour on? Well, not showering or eating, I can tell you that. I instead spent it on the computer.
I know, good choice on my part. For those of you who think I’m being sarcastic, stick it up your ear.
I still haven’t eaten, but that unopened can of baked beans is looking pretty good.
I probably won’t eat it till dinner time, though, I’ve got class in a few minutes.
Until then, let me just say this.
Life is like a jar of pickles. Sometimes it’s sweet, sometimes its dill, sometimes it’s eggs. Pickled eggs. And sometimes they’ve forgotten to put in something to pickle at all, and you’ve just got a glass jar filled with brine. I mean, I love to drink brine, but a cucumber or baby onion is nice once in a while. And very few people can live on glass chunks, so you don’t want to try to eat those. Unless of course you’ve properly covered your mouth in kevlar first! Though it is true that given enough force glass can slice right through kevlar, so you might be better off putting the brine into another container first, like one made of toast. The scientific community has been doing experiments with toast and kevlar for a while, and only in very rare occasions does the toast break through the kevlar. Your mouth should stay safe.
RDX, HMX, PETN, C6H2(NO2)3CH3, acetone peroxide, gobs and gobs of great granny’s gravy
As they say in France, parlez vous!
Earlier today, I thought of something interesting to say. I’ve forgotten it.
So I was thinking, since no one reads this, could I divulge all my deepest secrets? It’s like a diary, but instead of a tiny pony/heart/smiley face shaped lock, there is disinterest to keep my personal secrets safe. So here they are, in no particular order:
1. I occasionally eat ketchup right out of the packets. They’re free, right? So why not? They’re a little boost of lycopene and salt, and honestly who can’t use more… lycopene… in their diet? And salt is a great way to slim down your oversized arteries.
2. I often draw gruesome images of people in my classes dying in terrible, terrible ways. However, after I do so, I realize in horror that they can probably see the person sitting next to them and what they are drawing, so if there is enough head left in the picture I add facial hair, glasses, etc. to throw off the scent. Although they still might think I’m weird for drawing a person ripping out their own stomach because they’ve got an itch.
3. I stalk people. Not because I’m a creepy freak who gets his snils and jibblies (?) from stalking people, but I just do it because I am really bad at conversation. Stalking people, on the internet or otherwise, is a great way to find out interesting things to talk about with them. It’s not like I’d ever use anything against the stalkees. And besides, with the advent of Facebook, it’s so gal-darned EASY!
4. I’m pregnant. With that (———>) guy’s baby. Don’t ask. It’s embarrassing.
5. I once threw my mother from a train. I blame Billy Crystal.